One people, separate worlds
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May 23, 2012
I gave a talk to a Jewish women’s group recently, on the subject of Jews and the presidential vote. In the question-and-answer period, one woman asked, “What am I supposed to say when my [presumably non-Jewish] neighbors ask me about the ultra-Orthodox on welfare in Lakewood?”
A few days later, I spoke at a Reform synagogue on the same topic. Another q-and-a, similar questions: “Do you think we’re headed to a civil war with the ultra-Orthodox?” asked one man. “What do you think about the arrest of the rabbis in the New Jersey corruption scandal?” asked another.
Probably at no other time in Jewish history have non-Orthodox Jews and the haredim — fervently Orthodox — had less to do with one another. In Eastern Europe before the Shoa, secular Yiddishists and pious yeshiva bochers rubbed shoulders in communities that were “roiling and diverse” (in Alana Newhouse’s apt phrase). Today, the haredim have created a world unto themselves, living, learning, and working in ways meant to insulate them from outside influences, both Jewish and non-Jewish. The rest of us mostly live and work in ways indistinguishable from our non-Jewish neighbors.
Yet never have the haredim weighed so heavily on the thoughts of other Jews, here and in Israel. A series of scandals — from financial malfeasance to sex abuse to violent infighting among hasidic sects — has placed the fervently Orthodox on the front pages of American newspapers, and in the worst possible light. In Israel, an increasingly assertive haredi community is challenging Zionist assumptions when it comes to the military, civil rights, gender, and education. Secular and Modern Orthodox Israelis alike will insist that the haredi “threat” is nearly as dire as the saber-rattling from Iran.
Even this weekend’s big haredi blowout at the Mets’ Citi Field — an overflow crowd of men for a rally on the dangers of the Internet — did little to endear haredim to non-haredi Jews. At best, the organizers and participants looked quaint; at worst, they looked like inquisitors, shunning outside sources of knowledge lest they challenge the authorities of the rabbis.
But none of this questionable press fully explains the Jewish majority’s fixation on haredim and their sometimes questionable behavior. The truth is that to be a Jew is to identify with other Jews, no matter how their choices or lifestyles differ from your own. We cultivate this sense of peoplehood. And when we don’t, the outside world invariably makes sure we don’t forget it. When Jews misbehave, we tend to feel implicated. While American society has shown little inclination to ascribe collective guilt, we all brace for the backlash when a Madoff or Boesky is dragged before the bench.
The haredim compound this sense of collective responsibility — and guilt — by looking as they do. The haredi uniform of black hat, black coat, and beard shouts “JEW” in capital letters. Arrest a haredi rabbi and you’re not just indicting a Jew — you’re indicting an archetypical Jew.
But it’s not just misbehavior that fuels our fixation on the fervently Orthodox. For good and bad, the haredim represent a version of Judaism we thought we left behind with the Enlightenment. Jewish success has been associated with Enlightenment values: higher education, scientific inquiry, cultural achievement, freedom of conscience. Jump ahead a century or two and you can add feminism and acceptance of gays and lesbians. That haredim cling to their Old World values seems confounding.
Haredim push buttons among the most and least engaged Jews. Observant Jews who aren’t haredi cannot forgive the “black hats” for suggesting that Torah values and modernity are in conflict. Many observant Jews will say that Torah comes alive only when it encounters the real world and all its shmutz. To drag Jews and their Torah behind a self-made ghetto wall is a hillul Hashem, a desecration of Torah and its real intentions.
On the flip side, there is a certain kind of Jew whose whole Jewish identity is tied up in condemning the failings and hypocrisy of the Orthodox. Their indictment usually starts with the phrase, “They call themselves religious, and yet…,” before reciting the latest scandal. This sort of obsession can be self-justifying and a little Freudian — by pointing out the failings of religion, they can better justify their decision to leave it behind.
But whatever the source, these kinds of feelings are bred in insularity, for which the haredim must assume responsibility. Rabbi Avi Shafran, a spokesman for Agudath Israel of America, recently argued that “seeking to live among members of one’s own religious community and trying to avoid the effluence of a coarse popular culture” is not the same as medieval Christian asceticism. But the examples he gives of haredi engagement with non-haredi Jews are insignificant compared to the general trend.
No, I don’t think there is going to be warfare between haredi Jews and the rest of us — not outside of Israel, anyway. What we have instead are two communities that relate to one another in two distinct and distinctly unhealthy ways. On one hand, we ignore each other, and regard the other as if he or she clings to a different covenant. Or we scrutinize each other, seeing the other as a representative of the values we most revile. Either way, it’s a recipe for discord.
Andrew Silow-Carroll is Editor-in-Chief of the New Jersey Jewish News. Between columns you can read his writing at the JustASC blog.
Comments
Dan
May 23, 2012
As far as I’m concerned, Haredim aren’t Jews; they have about as much in common with secular Jews as secular Jews have with Martians. Unlike Martians, Haredim are Exhibit A for justifying every anti-Semitic canard. Except that in their case, it’s not a canard.
This is a cult, like Scientologists; the difference being that the Haredim try to dictate to the world, while the Scientologists generally don’t.
Harvey S. Cohen
May 23, 2012
I routinely daven with “black hats” (although certainly not with Haredim), and I deplore the narrow and xenophobic “comfort zones” that confine many of my fellow non-Orthodox. Haredim in the United States are obtrusive mostly in their appearance (although they do distort public policy on education and welfare where they live in large numbers).
In Israel, though, Haredim have an overwhelming impact on politics, the economy, civil society, and defense, and it is perfectly reasonable to pay them much attention.
abe
May 23, 2012
I’m as modern Orthodox as they get, and I have no problem with Haredim or the way they
CHOOSE to live their lives. This being a free country - still - anyone can live any way they choose.
I have a much bigger problem with secular Jews who think being Jewish is donating to the NAACP and watching SEINFELD.
NaturaNachum
May 23, 2012
I take exception to Abe’s comment. To deny that Haredim are exclusionary and dismissive is simply disingenuous. Haredim tend to vote in unison as directed by their rebbe; they deny women civil rights and they disown their own family members who choose to leave Chassidut. (In fact, leaving is incredibly difficult given the lack of secular skills that are provided in Haredi communities.) Finally, Abe, it’s ludicrous to deny that Haredim have been aggressive in using their political clout to gain benefits that have been denied to other people. Yes, that’s how the system works: I get it. But it’s not how someone living in a true Kiddush HaShem worldview would react. Finally, your jibe against secular Jews is interesting but uninformed - and it’s just not relevant.
dan bloom
May 23, 2012
Related as well:
The Silverman Manifesto (2012)
By Silverman Everyman
Enough of this self loathing and self hating! Enough of Jews
themselves denigrating themselves in public shows
of comedy or books! Enough of dysfunctional families
and ghetto Jews from the past! We are now living in 2012
and we are no longer dysfunctional people nor do we live
in dysfunctional families anymore and Jewish mother jokes
and Jewish Princess jokes and distasteful Joan Rivers’ Anne
Frank jokes should be thrown out the window. The Bronx and Brooklyn
ghettoes are things of the past. Wake up, fellow Jews and cast
off your self loathing and self hatred with these terrible jokes
about dysfunctional mothers and weak fathers and antisemitic tropes
that are sometimes even worse than Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice
schtick! Wake up, people!
We are a normal people now, successful, middle-class, no longer in the
New York City ghettoes where much of the old sick humor came from.
Sure, in the 1930s, those jokes had a purpose. Sure, in the 1950s,
after the war, maybe some of those jokes still had a purpose. But now,
in 2012, they have no purpose! Those jokes should be retired and you
know exactly what jokes I am talking about!
We don’t live in dysfunctional families anymore and we have success
stories all around, in an entirely new and loving way. It’s time for Jews
in America to wake up and smell the new air of happiness and life.
It’s time to stop the self loathing and self hating Catskills and Borscht
Belt jokes of the 1950s and celebrate the joyful reality of 2012.
Stand up and create
a new kind of warm, life enhancing and positive humor that goes beyond
the old stereotypes of yore.
Mark
May 24, 2012
I think the problem is many secular Jews Reform and the rest feel guilty it reminds them how their Great Great Grandparents where.When i was in some God Forsaken mountain in Afghanistan with 20 other guys only 1 other Jew who do i see Helicopter in a Chabad Chaplain with Kosher food for Passover.To see a helicopter land in a dangerous landing zone and see this Chabad Rabbi Jump out really opened my eyes to the ultra orthodox.They gained alot respect in my eyes.
hasidicrebbele
May 24, 2012
“No, I don’t think there is going to be warfare between haredi Jews and the rest of us — not outside of Israel, anyway.”—
T"G for this, it’s actually a miracle that you think this way.
But then again what do you call this article that you just wrote if not warfare? Guess what? “the rest of us” has been there forever, going back during the 1st and 2nd Beis Hamikdosh thinking they’re fighting the haredim. In reality you are not fighting them, you are fighting yourselves, not to be haredi.
Do you think that you can write like this and think you are fooling anybody? Even non-Jews understand what a haredi is and what he represents and envies what “the rest of us” envy.
IMHO the warfare was there, is still happening(from “the rest of us”), and will continue to happen until the One Above will gather us all and the Truth will be crystal clear.
Start bringing out the best of ALL of us in your writings and put a smile on your face and everyone else. Start writing stories like Mark just wrote.
Good Luck
Gidon Ben Avraham
May 27, 2012
“I think the problem is many secular Jews Reform and the rest feel guilty it reminds them how their Great Great Grandparents where.”
I’m Reform and I’ve never come across that sentiment….ever. The haredim are an embarassment. They are backwards and ignorant. Never that we envy them. We feel for their families. We feel for their children. We do not want to join them.
Jonathan
May 29, 2012
Let’s call a spade a spade. There is great anti Orthodox sentiment, even outright hatred, in the non-Orthodox community against the Orthodox. That hatred probably is akin to Muslim anti-semitism.
Macabeean
May 29, 2012
I had to look at the URL a couple of times to make sure I wasn’t reading a virtual edition of Der Sturmer, circa 1938. All we’re missing is one of those hook-nose rat-like caricatures so we can really get the full flavor of how backwards, benighted, filthy, cunning and unhygienic those hareidi Jews really are. Sure, Mr. Hyphen-hyphen makes pretend that he’s just throwing out a question of how unfortunate it is that we just can’t all get along. He’s fooling nobody.
Let me offer you another parallel from the new-age feel-good version of Chanuka celebrated by the Hyphen-Hyphen family. This version calls the holiday “the festival of lights” signifying the light of freedom, enlightenment and really, really good feelings towards everyone, including gays, lesbians, transexuals, multisexuals, hypersexuals and happily married couples of all genders and species. Of course, like so many things from Reform and other knock-off brands of Judaism, this version is a cover-up, a re-write to make it possible for them to still pretend they have anything to do with actual Judaism.
You see, it was really like this. There were the Hellenizers, the ones who wanted to dress like the Greeks, party like the Greeks, be enlightened like the Greeks and enjoy cozy relations with the Greek overlords so they could pick up the tax concessions and get filthy rich and most of all, feel really enlightened (sound familiar). So, they told the Greeks that those filthy, backwards Jews who run the Temple service with all those disgusting sacrificial rites were really subversive, had no regard for Greek law and culture and were otherwise detestable. The best thing for the Greek government to do, the Reform-Hellenizers said, was abolish those nasty, insular Jewish practices and you’ll get them in line with the new hip Greek way of living and paying taxes and they’ll be really enlightened, too.
Well, Matisyahu and Judah the Macabeean weren’t buying any of this garbage and they certainly weren’t giving up the covenant they made with G-d at Sinai to keep the Torah no matter what the Hyphen-Hyphen types of people said, even if it meant living in caves and fighting against impossible odds and being despised by the Hyphen-Hyphens. G-d, who we old, filthy, smelly types of Jews call Hashem, gave the Macabeeans a great and miraculous victory and made oil sufficient for only 1 day burn for 8 days when the Macabeeans restored the Temple service. The lesson was that the thing that makes us Jews special is that we are devoted to the one true light, the light of the Torah and the one true G-d, Hashem and not to any phony enlightenment, or reform, or modernity or isms. None of those things sustained us then and none of them will sustain us now.
So, Mr. Hyphen-Hyphen, your efforts to hide your burning anti-Semitism and your desperate attempts to ingratiate yourself to the Goyim and the enlightened world are really pathetic. And you should be deeply ashamed for publishing this article. But, now we know who you really are.
Former Hellenist Jew
May 29, 2012
Right on Maccabean! I was raised reform and taught all that hellenistic culture had to offer me… after I got to that higher learning so expoused by the hellenists (which is now a debt bubble ready to burst) and had ‘the college experience’, which, let’s just say isn’t anyone’s epitome of morality, I ended up at a traditional Shabbos meal. I asked my mother… that night by phone… “Mom, okay, we don’t believe in this stuff, but we’re Jews, so why don’t we keep Shabbos?” No good answer except that it’s too hard when living in a hellenist society. When I went to Israel, I asked my distant cousin why he didn’t keep Shabbos… he didn’t think he needed to be he lived in Israel.
Would the author be upset if his son or daughter intermarried? The intermarriage rate amongst the heterodox is what, 80 or 90%? Isn’t this why they’re expousing? Let’s live like the non-Jews and be “enlightened”...those that, you know, keep the 4th of the 10 commandments, to keep the Sabbath… they’re “backwards and smelly”, right? If it’s from a non-Jew, we call it anti-semitism. If it’s from a Jew, well, his grandchildren will probably be non-Jews, unfortunately.
Not every college student chances upon a traditional Shabbos meal to have his eyes opened to what his grandparents threw away. It was hard to overcome the contradiction of the hatred of Jews who followed… Judaism, and not some weak imitation of liberal protestantism that is the ‘reform’ movement and it’s breakaway, the ‘conservative’ movement. This hatred was further reinforced by the negative portrayals in NJJN, which we received every week. It’s just sad… there it is…right under our noses… the meaning of life… what we’re here to do… what our purpose is ... and secular Jews are raised not understanding it, and hating it. Then they can’t understand why their children throw it away completely.
Instead of hating those Jews that think differently than you do, at least be the ‘pluralists’ that you pretend to be and accept your fellow Jew.